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The Principled Matriarch

Principled mother with daughter

What do people see these days when they think about a woman in general? Do they just see her as a female person and what’s on the outside or do they think somewhat deeper? When people do look at some of the outward characteristics what do you think they look at besides the obvious or superfluous? I’m not sure exactly what each individual person sees but I know what I see and hear based off of trends, experience, and my personal opinions.

Women have come very far from the positions, capabilities, abilities, and opportunities they were once stifled from. Still in some cases or situations they have to fight more than their fare share for certain opportunities. However, what exactly causes this? I believe this stems from narrow minded individuals and mindless followers that believe conventional wisdom more than relying on personal experience and common sense.

In those situations women have been able to overcome many obstacles. Even in situations where they have to pull their fair share of the weight and responsibilities they have succeeded and excelled. Take female Soldiers and NCO’s, women doctors, politicians, scientists, physicists, computer scientists, women astronomers, and chemists. With my experiences in the Army I have seen women do some really awesome things.

I remember when I was at the NCO Academy taking some courses there were two or three female NCO’s in my class outnumbered by the male NCO’s. One of the female NCO’s was assigned to be my partner so we could work together. She was taller than me, pretty, smart, had leadership abilities of course, she had been divorced, and had a son at home. I remember there were a few instances where she was late because she had trouble finding somebody to watch her son. The last time she was late we were to ship out for a field training exercise but she was a little more late than usual. I wasn’t sure what was going on and called her a couple of times. But, having worked with her previously and knowing her circumstances I knew the event was important to her and she was the type of leader to do her best with the circumstances given her. So, I waited patiently and kept faith. She showed up ready to go just in time. I asked her if she was ok, she said yes and we got to work.

I knew that situation was stressful for her. I could tell by how she presented herself. However, she kept calm and disciplined as best she could. I know there are many women that have to face these types of situations and it’s not easy. Because she still showed up instead of giving up that showed her principles. She could have given up but there are values and principles ingrained in us as military members that become natural after a while. Some of us bring these with us before we enter the military and this is true for other professions and individuals.

Most women I have worked with they are either a professional and hold themselves to their organizations standards and their own or they are not and they don’t. The one’s that don’t, with some experience, you can tell the difference. But in interacting with women from various walks of life women can be a Principled Matriarch no matter where they are or what they do, even in a profession. From a burger flipper, to a college student, to a doctor, and engineer and mother they all have principles that guide them in what and how they do things. This includes how they present themselves wherever they are and whatever they’re doing.

I’m not saying that, even if she prides herself in following her principles, she has to present herself 100% professionally at all times. When a Principled Matriarch has to role up her sleeves, get down and dirty, get to working hard, and use her will she might not always end up looking like a professional. People that expect the opposite are naive and narrow minded or they just lack experience. Let’s take for example a woman that is a carpenter, mechanic, or an electrician. They don’t always go to work in a business suite and at the end of the day they might be just as sweaty and dirty as the men they work beside. What counts is what’s inside and how they present their principles that emanates outward. This can present itself in the quality of work they do, how they handle situations, how they communicate with others, and where they place their principles in each decision they make. Is the principle at the forefront at every decision or does that still need work? If that still needs work, even so, we live in a society that has made that dynamic difficult.

I’m not saying this is an easy excuse, rather it is difficult in many situations. The world has come to expect many things from women even though there are areas in which they are stifled or held back. Some women might have to stay with the status quo until situations become better or better choices present themselves. This is understandably difficult because their women counterparts might have already made things difficult for them by the way they do things. They might do things that are totally opposite of their principles and values. When this is done men in either the avocational niche or other areas in her life might expect something adverse. In the same areas but slightly different if the less-than-principled women are not corrected then those adverse dynamics will continue and it will make that all the more difficult in the future for the Principled Matriarch’s. I call this women shooting themselves in the foot.

A woman can be a Principled Matriarch no matter what their work is, their profession, or where they are getting their education. A matriarch has to do with the unique characteristics, abilities, attributes, principles, values, ethics, perspective, and physiological makeup of a woman. Women are such that they have their own unique way of complimenting us men and us them. When we are able to work and understand each other that gives both strength that with both types of perspectives creates things that are even more unique. An experienced person can see where work was done and one side had more say so or influence than the other. However, a Principled Matriarch knows how to interact and communicate with not only her male counterparts but also her female counterparts, her children, and husband. She knows how and when to apply her principles in measured degrees, by experience, to each variant of an increment or decrement within a dynamic. When she is done working with other people they walk away feeling valuable, important, equal, and like they learned something.

I know that there is much more to this that I could write or explain here. However, I hope I have given you a good explanation on what I believe is a Principled Matriarch. I know there is some philosophy attributed to this as well and could write a book on the Principled Patriarch and the Principled Matriarch, but that might be for a future project. Even though I have had some adverse experiences with women I know of their strength, their values, principles, serenity, and exponential worth to name some. I also know that there are many women out there that are the total opposite of the ones I have encountered adversely. To the Principled Matriarch’s reading this please stay strong, know I believe you are important, you are valuable, beautiful no matter what, teach the less fortunate one’s, and may you continue to have the will to move forward.


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